ON THE GENERAL SUCKINESS OF THIS TIME OF YEAR
a short story
Once upon a time, there was a girl named Smelika who lived in Iceland, and liked to pogo-stick. Smelika was a very happy person with straight hair. She also had a brother named Smayn, and a Mother whom she was taller than, and a Dad who was taller than her and also liked to swim.
Anyway, Smelika was all kinds of pro at pogo-sticking. She won the Icelandic Youth Pogo-Stick Competition, in which she would get to pogo-stick on TV. Everyone was very proud of her. Heck, she was proud of herself. She was very happy, until February began.
Smelika HATED February. Not because it was the month of loooooove and Valentine's Day. Which everyone thought is why she hated February. But that's not why, Smelika actually had a policy on that type of stuff: she had no feelings on Valentine's Day. Because liking Valentine's Day was lame, and hating it was pathetic. So she was simply emotionless about that particular Hallmarkesque holiday.
No, she hated February because it was full of suckiness. It was far enough into the semester where the suckiness of your grades started catching up with you. It was sucky because it was still winter, and cold outside. And this year it was especially sucky because she was trying to figure out where to go to school and how to pay for it, and recieving mass rejection emails to programs she wanted to attend. And okay, it was a little of sucky because of SadieHawkinsValentine'sDayandthosetypesofthings, and friends being too busy to listen to her whine. Not that she blamed them of course, listening to other people whine was about a fun as cutting off your own ear. Obviously some people enjoyed stuff like that, say VanGough. But most people did not.
So Smelika wallowed by herself. In her room. Making sad music playlists until the battery on her iPod died, and reading her government textbook. But she eventually had to go back to school, at which point she realized that even though this is the time of year when all the sucky things start piling up into a big giant mountain of suck, there were actually lots of things to not be depressed about.
For instance, her national pogo-sticking contest was in a mere two weeks! And even though her friends were busy a lot, they still made it a point to talk to her, and listen to her vent, and also investigate into top secret matters for her, and then listen to her vent more once the top secret matters had been figured out. Smelika was happy to have such awesome friends.
Appeased with this kind of anti-suck propaganda, Smelika gritted her teeth, and prepared herself for the next several incredibly busy months.
Note: this story is in no way related to my life.
a short story
Once upon a time, there was a girl named Smelika who lived in Iceland, and liked to pogo-stick. Smelika was a very happy person with straight hair. She also had a brother named Smayn, and a Mother whom she was taller than, and a Dad who was taller than her and also liked to swim.
Anyway, Smelika was all kinds of pro at pogo-sticking. She won the Icelandic Youth Pogo-Stick Competition, in which she would get to pogo-stick on TV. Everyone was very proud of her. Heck, she was proud of herself. She was very happy, until February began.
Smelika HATED February. Not because it was the month of loooooove and Valentine's Day. Which everyone thought is why she hated February. But that's not why, Smelika actually had a policy on that type of stuff: she had no feelings on Valentine's Day. Because liking Valentine's Day was lame, and hating it was pathetic. So she was simply emotionless about that particular Hallmarkesque holiday.
No, she hated February because it was full of suckiness. It was far enough into the semester where the suckiness of your grades started catching up with you. It was sucky because it was still winter, and cold outside. And this year it was especially sucky because she was trying to figure out where to go to school and how to pay for it, and recieving mass rejection emails to programs she wanted to attend. And okay, it was a little of sucky because of SadieHawkinsValentine'sDayandthosetypesofthings, and friends being too busy to listen to her whine. Not that she blamed them of course, listening to other people whine was about a fun as cutting off your own ear. Obviously some people enjoyed stuff like that, say VanGough. But most people did not.
So Smelika wallowed by herself. In her room. Making sad music playlists until the battery on her iPod died, and reading her government textbook. But she eventually had to go back to school, at which point she realized that even though this is the time of year when all the sucky things start piling up into a big giant mountain of suck, there were actually lots of things to not be depressed about.
For instance, her national pogo-sticking contest was in a mere two weeks! And even though her friends were busy a lot, they still made it a point to talk to her, and listen to her vent, and also investigate into top secret matters for her, and then listen to her vent more once the top secret matters had been figured out. Smelika was happy to have such awesome friends.
Appeased with this kind of anti-suck propaganda, Smelika gritted her teeth, and prepared herself for the next several incredibly busy months.
Note: this story is in no way related to my life.
love you, person-who-is-in-no-way-shape-or-form-related-to -smelika.
ReplyDelete~ As they say, it is in the depth of winter that we finally learn there is in us an invincible summer.
ReplyDeleteBut, T. S. Elliot thought April the cruelest month ?
ReplyDeleteWasn't it vanGogh, who forgot to stop shaving when he got to his ear ?
ReplyDeleteIs this fictional Smelika person related to the Danish Miss Smilla from Peter Høeg's 1992 novel, Smilla's Sense of Snow (and the subsequent movie) ?
ReplyDeleteAfter all, Iceland and Daneland are very close to each other and one could easily be a proxy for the other, like Iceland for the US's northermost state.
Anyone who calls themselves Smellika is asking for suckiness. Just sayin'
ReplyDelete